Dateline Tatooine: Teen Rejects Antique Lightsaber Gift from Retired Jedi
Tatooine resident and retiree Ben Kenobi attempted to a give a teenage neighbor, Luke Skywalker, an ancient weapon known as a lightsaber yesterday afternoon. The lightsaber, an obscure weapon comprised of a cylindrical metal hilt that emits a brilliant and deadly energy beam, was once the iconic weapon of the now defunct Jedi Order. Skywalker, unimpressed and too young to have ever seen a lightsaber in person, is said to have politely refused the gift.
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“I’m surprised and disappointed that the boy rejected the lightsaber, to be sure,” Kenobi admits. “When I was his age, lightsabers were all the rage. Nearly everyone I knew was carrying one.”
“I appreciate the gesture, really I do!” Skywalker says. “Everyone tells me this lightsaber is rare and valuable, but antiques really aren’t my thing. Besides, to be honest, I barely even know this Ben Kenobi guy. It doesn’t feel right accepting the gift.”
“That lightsaber belonged to his father!” Kenobi grumbles. “I’ve been holding onto this precious heirloom for nearly two decades, waiting until the boy was old enough for me to pass it down to him. Declining the gift is denying his destiny.”
“I know the lightsaber belonged to my father, but I never even knew the guy so I really don’t see the point in having one of his old things.” Skywalker says. “Besides, if I take the lightsaber, it will be of no use to me. It will just sit in a box on my shelf collecting dust.”
Aneeda Rem, Associate Professor of Sociology at Coruscant University, says Skywalker’s disinterest in the family heirloom is common. “Our research shows that older generations often overestimate the younger generation’s interest in receiving legacy items, like the antique lightsaber.” Rem says. “Young people across the galaxy are rejecting their parents’ old books, fine dinnerware, Alderaanian rugs and the like. They just don’t connect with the objects the same way that their parents did.”
“Years ago, I knew people that would have killed for a lightsaber like that,” Kenobi says. He shakes his head. “Times were different. The galaxy was different.” he sighs. “Now I’m an old man and all of my friends who carried lightsabers are long gone. Time catches up with all of us, eventually.”
Kenobi examines the antique lightsaber, running his fingers over the small dents and dings to the finish. He smiles wanly and opens the lid of a nondescript, knee-high, storage chest in his living room. Kenobi keeps all of his personal treasures there.
The contents of the chest include a tattered brown robe, a stack of out of print meditation books, a japor snippet necklace and other neglected relics from, in his own words, “long ago and far away”. He deposits the lightsaber inside and closes the lid.